Without You
by HeartandMind2013
Summary: All characters that you see in this story all belong to Bioware. The story behind this is based on the event of Leandra Hawke being taken by the blood mage to bring back his dead wife. I hope you enjoy and please leave any comments that you wish to leave. Criticizm is allowed so feel free to comment. {Warning there is some language used in some parts of the story}
1. The Funeral

_I'm nowhere if I'm here without You~Ashes Remain_

_All characters that you see in this story all belong to Bioware. The story behind this is based on the event of Leandra Hawke being taken by the blood mage to bring back his dead wife. I hope you enjoy and please leave any comments that you wish to leave. Criticizm is allowed so feel free to comment._

* * *

**Underneath the cold November sky  
I'll wait for You  
As the pages of my life roll by  
I'll wait for You  
I'm so desperate just to see Your face  
Meet me in this broken place**

The room was dimmed, quiet. Not a single pin drop could be heard throughout the house. The Hawke family had returned from the expedition a few years ago and decided to buy back their mother's childhood home. The carvings in the wall were marked by Leandra herself as to what Hawke could remember her mother telling her.

Everyone was grieving after the death of Hawke's mother. She was the light in everything, everyone. To now never hear her laughter echo through the lightened halls was something that pained Hawke dearly. She had lost her sister Bethany to the Templar's and now to loose her mother... by a Mage was something else entirely.

"I should have watched over you more closely" Hawke spoke to herself as she repeated the phrase more than once to herself.

There was a slight knock of the door when Anders; the healer who lived in Lowtown walked into the room. He looked over to see Hawke looking out of the window which was positioned right in the middle of the left wall. She looked drained, worn out, tired as indicated by the black parts under her eyes and scared. To see his lover like this was breaking his heart already.

**Hold me now  
I need to feel You  
Show me how  
to make it new again  
There's no one I can run to  
And nothing I could ever do  
I'm nowhere if I'm here  
without You**

Anders placed himself beside Hawke on the bed and looked to her. Close up he could see that she was concentrated on the window and what was on the outside of the room.

"Hawke" He whispered to see if that would get her attention a little but nothing came back until a few moments afterwards.

"I should have been there to protect her more. After what happened to Carver and now Bethany was affecting her more than anyone else. I wasn't there to keep her safe like I promised her I would" Her gaze was still fixed on the window and what was happening on the streets below.

"You know it wasn't your fault. What happened was the work of someone who was wicked within. Maybe even at birth he had power that he did not understand but to use it for evil in the world because there was not enough. Mages are entirely different to blood mages" He sighed. There was nothing much he could say as it felt that he was going on towards criticising his own people but what happened to Leandra was something different entirely. He had to be here for Hawke, because he needed her too.

A single tear fell down Hawke's cheek as she slowly dropped her head to Anders chest. She was thankful he was here with her but he didn't have to carry this burden. It was a burden that needed to be avenged by Hawke herself.

**Even if You take it all away  
I'll wait for You  
Even when the light begins to fade  
I'll wait for You  
I'm so desperate calling out Your name  
Meet me in this broken place**

The next morning was the funeral. Many had turned up to wish Leandra Hawke their wishes and their prayers. Hawke was thankful to have her friends and Anders with her as she knew that without them she wouldn't have lasted long. Their strength was the thing that she needed most right now. They were there when the horror took place but one person in particular was there for her all the way. Anders.

He was the one who held her hand when Hawke broke the news to Bethany about their mothers passing. He was there to hold her when things were proving too hard to cope with. He was there to close her wounds when she took everything out on herself; he was there when she just needed to hear those three little but strong words 'I love you'.

After the service was over everyone began to make their way back towards their homes while Anders and the others stuck around just in case Hawke had ideas, but thankfully she didn't.

"Guys can you give me a moment. I just want to say goodbye" The others nodded in consent and gave Hawke a quick embrace before moving back towards the main entrance. Anders stood around but behind one of the pillars to wait for Hawke to finish.

"You once told me that you and Father did everything you could to keep us out of trouble. Well it did kind of backfire didn't it?" A small laugh came from her lips. "I know you would be proud of me now after what you said when I held you in my arms but I failed you overall and nothing I can do can fix that now. I don't know what we will do without you and your laughter lighting the whole house. I told Bethany about what happened. Somehow I know that she blames me for what happened to you but we are both hurting so much because we love you too much. Why did it have to be you Mother? Why?"

**I'm tired of running**

Until now I feel like my life has been a danger to all who have stepped in the middle of it. Now, I know what I need to do to make sure that nothing like what happened to my Mother ever happens to anyone else.

I am the Champion of Kirkwall, and this is my story!


	2. Breaking the news to Uncle Gamlen

Making her way back to the estate, Marian walked in with her arms wrapped around her and her eyes averted to the floor. Having said her final words to her Mother at her grave she told everyone that she was going to make her way back to the estate. All of them told her that they would walk her back but Hawke shook her head and told them she needed time to herself. Anders didn't like the idea of having her walk back on her own but he knew she needed time but he would go check up on her as soon as she had a few moments to herself.

"Ah Messere, it is good to see you back and-" Bodhan cut himself off as he saw the way his master looked to him. Her eyes were red as to indicate she had been crying along the way and her arms firmy around her stomach looking like she was never going to let go. He saw her walk off and make her way up the stairs before closing the door. Bodhan lowered his head as Sandel came to the side of him. "Leandra?" he said. Bodhan simply looked to his son and shook his head.

"I'm so sorry messere" he muttered as he walked off into the back room where Gamlen was seated.

"Are they back? Is Leandra here?" He asked worryingly while practically jumping out of his seat.

"I will go and speak to Messere Hawke to let her know that you are here." Bodhan walked out of the room, climbed the stairs and knocked on Hawke's door. "Messere, you're Uncle Gamlen is asking to speak to you." There was nothing but silence.

Bodhan sighed before closing his eyes. "I'm sorry for you're loss, Master" he said before he walked away back down the stairs trying not to alert Gamlen in the process. This was going to be hard on Hawke as it was.

* * *

After a few moments alone to grieve, Hawke opened the door to her master bedroom and walked down the stairs. The estate was chilly but as she walked into the sitting hall she was glad to see that Bodhan has burned the wood in the fireplace. Sitting on the chair which was near the fireplace Marian took a breath before feeling the heat which were being emitted from the flames.

A door opened up from the side stairs as Hawke knew what was about to come.

"Did you find her?" asks a worrying Gamlen coming down the stairs and standing at the end of the banister.

"I'm sorry, Uncle. She's gone."

"You were right about the flowers and everything. I... I can't believe she's gone." Gamlen didn't really show any emotions in the past but Hawke could hear it in his voice that he was holding back on his emotions.

"I was too late" replies Hawke.

Hearing those words made Gamlen angry. Crossing his arms and standing in a defensible stance he looked over to his niece. "So you're to blame! If you'd been quicker or stronger, you could have... she could be..." Unable to hold it in any longer a sob escapes his lips. "Why her? Why Leandra?"

Looking into the flames Hawke rose from the chair and she kinda looked like she was hypnotized by their gaze. "The killed used Mother to magically reconstruct his dead wife. They had the same... face."

Getting even more angrier Gamlen rose his voice a little more than he intended. "What sought or nightmarish magic is that? Oh, Maker..." Passing back and fourth Gamlen continued his onslaught. "Maybe the Templars are right. Lock up the mages, throw away the key!"

Hawke stood shocked out o his own heart. Had he forgotten that Bethany was a victim to the Templar's hate? "You're happy they took Bethany away?"

Gamlen finally came to a stand still. "No... i didn't mean it like that." He sighed trying to collect his thoughts. "I wish magic hadn't touched her. She would've been better off. Magic's always run in this family, it's a curse. Now even you're own Mother has fallen victim to it!" Feeling the heat behind his eyes Gamlen turned his head and tried to turn that feeling into hate. "I wish you never told me what that twisted son of a b*** did to her. I wish i hadn't asked. I hope you killed him!" He said angered. Hawke nodded in reply. "Good, i hope it hurt!"

Making his way towards the back Gamlen turned to Hawke. "I will deal with breaking the news to Bethany. You've enough on your mind. Take care, my girl." Gamlen walked out of the room and headed to the front of the estate where he opened the door and exited the building, never looking back while Hawke was left to think about why he was too slow to rescue her own Mother. Sitting back down on the chair, Marian looked back into the flames somehow feeling comfort within them.

* * *

_Hawke reaches out and catches her falling Mother in her arms. Kneeling on the floor Marian looked to her Mother before looking to Anders who is approaching her side._

_"I'm sorry, there's nothing i can do. His magic was what was keeping her alive."_

_"I knew you would come." Leandra looks to her daughter and manages to smile a little in reassurance that she was seeing her daughter again. _

_"You know me, always trying to save the day." A little laugh came from Hawke as she smiled to her Mother before it quickly faded. Her features were so pale she was barley recognizable to anyone. Seeing her like this was something any daughter doesn't wish to see._

_"Shh. Don't fret, darling. That man would have kept me trapped in here, but now... I'm free. I get to see Carver and Bethany again, and you're father... but you'll be here all alone."_

_"I should have watched over you more closely. I should have..." Holding on to her Mother's hand Marian's head falls as tears began to follow and trickle down her cheek. Leandra lifts her free hand to her daughters face and slowly caresse her cheek to wipe away the flowing tears from her beautiful face._

_"My little girl has become so strong. I love you-" At that moment Hawke looks into her Mothers eyes. "You've always made me so proud." for the last time before Leandra slowly closes her eyes and her breath is no longer sensed. More tears begin to fall as Hawke lowers her head and the others come to her side._


	3. Meeting Good Old King Alistair

A year had passed as more and more problems were beginning to arise in the streets of Kirkwall. The Templars and Mages were at each others throats every day, never leaving each other alone, always plotting something to get back at the other.

After the death of her mother Hawke had become the problem solver once again but more and more were continuing to arise. Some of them were petty such as helping out move some cargo to the docks but you know Hawke, always the one to help no matter what the problem my be but some of them were a little more serious that that. Reports of one of her most closest friends being under investigation for... parading her fellow guards. Thing were more interesting by the day.

A letter had appeared on her desk that morning as Hawke looked to see that it bared the seal of the royals. Opening it and reading the content inside it was from the King of Ferelden but what would he want with Hawke?

**Champion,**

**Things are starting to blow out of proportion with regards to the Mages and Templars. I am trying all i can to keep them in line as much as i can but i fear that it will not last long. Meet me in the Viscount's Keep and we will talk more.**

**Alistair ~ King of Ferelden**

Folding the piece of paper back up and placing it back into the letter Hawke began to make her way towards the Keep with Anders, Isabella and Aveline.

Upon walking into the keep Hawke and the others heard the familier voice of the great Knight-Commander Meredith. "Looks like she got her mouth in before us." she said as she began to come up to the two.

"Let me guess: That's your final answer?" said the King. Hawke looked at his attire as he was wearing the armor of the great Kings with the flag of the Kings strapped to it with his arms crossed over his chest. He did look handsome if she did say so herself.

"Three mages have fled to Ferelden, and you have intervened to protect them as if it is your right to do so. What other answer did you expect, your Majesty?" Meredith asked.

"A "maybe" might have been nice."

"I do not deal in "maybes". I deal with cold, hard facts-as should you." Meredith argued as she regarded to the King.

"Perhaps when Ferelden next chooses a king, it will be one who takes his duty to the Maker seriously." Taking her leave Meredith walks out of the keep while the others are left to stand at ease.

"Well, that was awkward."

"That's just Meredith's idea of Kirkwall hospitality." Hawke joked as she was able to finally address the king.

"Really? Kirkwall brutality must rip the skin off your face, then." Alistair added.

"This is the Champion of Kirkwall." Teagan added who was standing a little back from Alistair.

Extending his hand Alistair waited for Hawke to add to the gesture to whish she did with a firm handshake. "Right! I'm Alistair, uh... king of Ferelden. And this is Teagan, my uncle, sort of."

"I'm actually Teagan. I'm only sort of his uncle."

"Your Majesty-" All of them turned to see Aveline getting down to one knee. "May i say what an honor it is to meet you."

"You could, but you'd be the first today." Alistair added as he looked over to the woman.

Aveline finally rose from the floor. "I fought at Ostagar. What happened there was... a great tragedy."

"Ah, yes, yes it was. Thankfully the man responsible has paid for that."

"Say... weren't you a Grey Warden once?" Anders asked while looking to the King.

"That's the rumor. Wait, weren't you...?" Alistair asked noticing something familiar about the man.

"That's the rumor."

"Huh. I guess we get around."

"So your a king now?" Isabella added. "Moving up in the world!"

"Isabella, right? You look... different."

"Don't we all."

Alistair and Isabella once met in a tavern known as the black purl. The Warden and her companions had stopped there for some drinks and food before they set off on the road once again but walked into a little more than that. There was a woman who much to Isabella's likening was in a fight with some sailors who wanted more than just her looks if you know what i mean...

"I was hoping we could talk. Would've been better timing before being emasculated by Meredith, but i'm not picky."

"Things are looking up! It's not every day i get called on to meet with foreign leaders every day." Hawke added.

"I know you came here from Lothering. A Ferelden refugee that did well for herself, against all odds. I have to admit, i was hoping your influence in Kirkwall might be of use. Things... haven't been going well in Orlais. Without a viscount here, however, there's only the Knight-Commander to deal with."

"Oh, the usual. Attempted assassinations, uprisings, fancy parties with stinky cheeses. Apparently, some Orlesians think it would be grand to get their lost province back."

"Well, we won't let them swoop down on us, will we?" added a well engaged uncle Teagan.

"That's right. Swooping is bad."

"You know, with your support there could be a viscount." Hawke said implying to herself.

"Thats asking a lot!" Teagan added.

"It's tempting, but i'm sorry to say that my support won't mean much without the support of the Templars." Alistair sighed before continuing. "I suppose it doesn't matter. I was hoping to have your help before Meredith got wind of my arrival, but that's done now. What you can do is protect Kirkwall. It will take someone like you to keep it from falling apart."

"Protect Kirkwall from what, exactly?" Hawke asked. Protecting the city wasn't anything new to her but if there was anything more she could do then the cards would be on the table.

"You ask me. The biggest threat to this city just walked out the door." A slight giggle came from Hawke as she agreed with what the king had said.

"Well, i suppose i should get back to the old ball and chain." He said referring to the Queen of Ferelden and the hero of their very city.

"You know, the queen hates it when you call her that." Teagan said with a sniffle of laughter.

"No she doesn't. Just because she killed an Archdemon... she doesn't scare me."

"You keep telling yourself that, your Majesty." The two of them walked of as Hawke shook her head and smiled. She and her companions did the same and left the Keep, making there way to the Hanged Man. They needed some down time.


End file.
